Category Archives: Favorite Quotes
I have enjoyed coffee since I was 12. At that point my mom insisted I have only one cup per day mixed with a lot of milk. I gave up the milk when my husband groused about having to put it in when he brought me a cup of coffee. (This was even though I was expected to add TWO spoonsful of sugar to each cup I brought HIM). I always drink it black now, unless the coffee needs help for some reason.
Over the years, coffee has been good for you or bad for you, over and over. I think right now the ‘experts’ are saying it’s okay. I’m glad they’re happy. I don’t pay attention. I drink coffee all day long. Now I drink a bottle of water in-between cups of coffee, which results in more exercise going to the bathroom several times per day…
I even drink it right before bed. It doesn’t keep me awake. I guess my system has developed a tolerance for caffeine.
I’m plebian when it comes to coffee. I don’t like the fancy-ness of Starbucks. I don’t even like special blends. I don’t like flavorings of any kind added. I just want good, black, plain coffee. My husband got a Keurig coffee maker that we use when I’ve drunk the pot of coffee we make in the morning and would still really like ONE MORE CUP. We got a really large cup and put in lots of water when we make a cup. And then I dilute it with hot water from the tap and put it in the microwave. The brand that suits me the best so far is Donut-Shop Regular.
Coffee is good for what ails me. I could even give up chocolate before I would stop drinking a good cup of coffee.
MEDICAL EXAMS Doug Powell via Marsha Koenig
One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a ‘massive internal fart.’
Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg
During a patient’s two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his medications. ‘Which one?’ I asked. ‘The patch… The Nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I’m running out of places to put it!’ I had him quickly undress and discovered what I hoped I wouldn’t see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! Now, the instructions include: “Please remove the old patch before applying a new one.” Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair, Norfolk, VA
While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, ‘How long have you been bedridden?’ After a look of complete confusion she answered .’ Why, not for about twenty years – when my husband was alive.’
Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson – Corvallis, OR
MEDICAL EXAMS Doug Powell via Marsha Koenig
“Man comes into the ER and yells . . .’My wife’s going to have her baby in the cab.’ I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady’s dress and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs – – – and I was in the wrong one.” ~ Submitted by Dr. Mark Mac Donald, San Francisco
“At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient’s anterior chest wall. ‘Big breaths,’. . I instructed. ‘Yes, they used to be,’. ..replied the patient. ” ~ Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA
“Fill your house with stacks of books, in all the crannies and all the nooks.” — Dr. Seuss
“I’m wondering what to read next.” — Matilda, Roald Dahl
“Reading should not be presented to children as a chore or duty. It should be offered to them as a precious gift.” — Kate DiCamillo
“Books make great gifts because they have whole worlds inside of them.” — Neil Gaiman
“You may have tangible wealth untold. Caskets of jewels and coffers of gold. Richer than I you can never be — I had a mother who read to me.” — Strickland Gillilan
“Oh, magic hour, when a child first knows she can read printed words!” — A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, 1943
“When I say to a parent, “read to a child”, I don’t want it to sound like medicine. I want it to sound like chocolate. ” — Mem Fox
“Children are made readers on the laps of their parents.” — Emilie Buchwald
“I used to walk to school with my nose buried in a book.” — Coolio
“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more you learn, the more places you’ll go.” — Dr. Seuss
I don’t mean to point out the obvious, but I’m going say it: you’re not going to live forever. Neither am I.
I don’t know what makes you smile, laugh, or feel good, but you deserve to be doing more of it. A lot more. In fact, you deserve to be so giddy your cheeks hurt.
And if for some reason, you aren’t happy today, then find someone to make happy.
And you will be.”
“You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, “My God, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!” ~ Dave Barry
“A dog is one of the remaining reasons why some people can be persuaded to go for a walk.” ~ O.A. Battista
“The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.” ~ Samuel Butler
Today, after my 72-hour shift at the fire station, a woman ran up to me at the grocery store and gave me a hug. When I tensed up, she realized I didn’t recognize her. She let go with tears of joy in her eyes and the most sincere smile and said; “On 9-11-2001, you carried me out of the World Trade Center.”
“When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but do not quit.”
Today, I asked my mentor – a very successful business man in his 70s what his top 3 tips are for success. He smiled and said;
“Read something no one else is reading, think something no one else is thinking, and do something no one else is doing.”
“Today, I interviewed my grandmother for part of a research paper I’m working on for my Psychology class.
When I asked her to define success in her own words, she said;
“Success is when you look back at your life and the memories make you smile.”
* Nothing ticks you off more than that moment during an argument
when you realize you’re wrong.
* There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
* I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately
clear your computer history if you die.
* How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just
nod and smile because you still didn’t hear what they said?
* You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at
work when you’ve made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything
productive for the rest of the day.
“Pitching is 80% of the game. The other half is hitting and fielding.”
– Mickey Rivers, baseball player
“Solutions are not the answer.”
– Richard Nixon, former U.S. President
“Permitted vehicles not allowed.”
– Road sign on US 27
“SAFETY FIRST: Please put on your seat belt – prepare for accident.”
– Sign on backseat of Taxi
“If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.”
– Terry Venables
“Coming on to pitch is Mike Moore, who is six-foot-one and 212 years old.”
– Herb Score, Sportscaster
“We’re going to move left and right at the same time.”
– Jerry Brown, Governor of California
“I have a God-given talent. I got it from my dad.”
– Julian Wakefield, Missouri basketball player
“He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.”
– Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota.
“The largest crowd ever in the state of Las Vegas.”
– Mark Jones, TV Broadcaster
“The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It’s only the people who make them unsafe.”
– Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia.
“It is white.”
– George W. Bush, when asked what the White house was like by a student in East London
“If it weren’t for electricity we’d all be watching television by candlelight.”
– George Gobel
“I cannot tell you how grateful I am — I am filled with humidity.”
– Gib Lewis, speaker of the Texas House
“Does the album have any songs you like that aren’t on it?
– Harry News, music reviewer