I’ve spent much of my life working to avoid my fears – deluding myself that I really had CONTROL. I’ve gotten halfway there now. I’ve admitted that a lot of the things I fear I CAN’T control. I haven’t been able to shut off the worry, but at least the acknowledgment allows me to put much of my energy elsewhere. I’m also doing better at living in the moment. Before my husband and I finally married (49 years ago now), I would wish away the present because I was waiting for his next leave from the Marines. I was waiting to finish college. I was waiting – wishing away much of what should have been an enjoyable time. I was ‘there,’ but didn’t really appreciate a lot of people and things I should have.
I’m doing better at living NOW. Appreciating what I have. Trying to show the people in my life how very much they mean to me in every way I can. I’m trying to do what I can on a daily basis to get healthier – getting the lard off gradually and exercising. I’m trying to pull my husband in on this so that we can squeeze out all life has to offer – together. I’m sticking my neck out and trying to learn new things. It’s all a work in progress, but by the time I kick the bucket I should have things figured out. :0)