Tag Archives: getting old ain’t for sissies

Klutz of the Day Award

elizabeth hill – liz.blogspot.com

Sometimes my husband and I vie for this coveted award, but today I won hands-down.

I did another session in my closet. (The rest of it is fine tuning.) I got the towels and washcloths out of my closet and put them on the hallway shelves that are between bedrooms. In trying to clear off a couple of shelves, I was carrying a big bag of quilts and managed to stumble on ‘something.’ The next thing I knew I was on my face on the floor. Happily, my face was in the big bag of quilts, so it was none the worse for wear. My knees and forearms not so much. I have a very mild, but stinging, rug burn on both knees and my shins, plus my forearms. I started to yell for my husband, realized I was more embarrassed than hurt, and so just got to an upright sitting position on the floor and patted Amber, who was being quite companionable.

When I felt okay again, I was able to finish what I was doing, strip the bed and change the sheets, and brought the laundry downstairs. I told my husband about the fall, and he related that HE also fell this morning (while I was out having a massage) trying to discipline Amber, who had gotten into my trash can again. So we’re a pair. We agreed that we need to be even MORE careful than we thought we were being.

I’m going to finish vacuuming ( I need to do the tiled area on the first floor), the second load of wash, and then I’m done for the day.

I would rather win the award than have my husband win it. As Bette Davis said, “Getting old ain’t for sissies.”

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Filed under Are YOU also older than Dirt?, quality of life, The Fun of Getting Old

Embarrassed

 

My husband and I have sold used books and DVDs on Amazon for several years now. We make enough sometimes to make us feel we’re recouping some of what we’ve spent on books, allowing us to feel less guilty for buying more.

My husband opened the seller account, but I handle the packaging of the books sold, record keeping, confirming shipments online, etc.  If we only sell one book, the process is very easy. Selling 7 books in less than a day’s time makes it difficult to keep orders straight.

I told you yesterday that I went through the books in the entertainment center in our living room, listing some for sale on Amazon and donating the others to our local library. I listed several, and bagged up 7 Walmart bags of donated books that we’ll take to the library today.

Last night we sold 3 books. I packaged them for mailing and put them on our go-out table. By this morning, we had sold 4 more! I went through things carefully, printing out the shipping labels and info and packaging one book at a time so I didn’t get confused.

I made a list of what had sold and where the books were being shipped so that I could get online later today and confirm each shipment with a USPS number. (The only ones not on the list yet were the ones ready for shipping on the go-out table.)

I ran into one sale for which I didn’t have the book! I looked through the ones for sale very carefully several times. I couldn’t find it. I finally admitted defeat, wrote to the buyer, apologized profusely, telling her I didn’t know how this happened since I list books by their ISBN number. I cancelled the order and issued a refund for her money. I was embarrassed, telling my husband I was old and doofus, but was being as careful as possible.

I took the newly packaged books in to the go-out table and added the ones already packaged to my list for confirmation. THERE WAS THE BOOK I COULDN’T FIND.  You can’t UN-cancel an order. You can’t put spilt milk back into the bottle.

SO – I’m embarrassed TWICE now. I’ll wait a week and then list the ‘sold-and-order-canceled’ book again next week….

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Filed under Are YOU also older than Dirt?, Challenges

“Getting old ain’t for sissies.” – Take 1

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“Getting old ain’t for sissies” ~ Bette Davis

Getting old sucks. There’s no getting around it.  The list of ‘what-you-can’t-do-anymore’ continues to grow as does the list of ‘what-you-can’t-eat-anymore.’  Your body goes on strike, yelling at you from one area or another. You move more slowly – and many times, stiffly – as you move through your day. Your memory begins to fail. But every once in awhile – if you can stand back and pretend you’re watching a MOVIE of an old person – you can laugh at yourself.

I did that this morning. My husband and I get up each morning groggily wandering through our list of what we need to do to get the day started, doing things out of habit, rather than having to think right after awaking. One of the things I do is wash my hair in the kitchen sink after my group of things is done and we’ve eaten breakfast. I take off my watch and put it on the counter beside the coffee thermos and my waiting coffee cup.

I had just finished washing my hair and was walking while drying it with a towel on the way to the hair dryer in the bathroom when Amber was clamoring around, wanting to go back outside – after just coming in again – and was doing her best to herd me toward the garage door. I managed to NOT fold up like a tent when our sweet 91-pound ‘puppy’ hit me in the exact right spot behind my knees that has brought me down many times.  I managed to get a gate between us. When I saw the pile of clothes and towels on the utility room floor, it reminded me that I was planning to do several loads of laundry this morning. I stopped and started a load and then dried my hair in the bathroom.

When I went back to the kitchen to pour myself some coffee, my watch wasn’t there!  I walked around, checking all the surfaces in the kitchen, on the divider between the kitchen and the dining area, the dining table, the bathroom counter, but no watch! I checked everything again – KNOWING it HAD to be SOMEWHERE, but it wasn’t.

I looked at the washer and thought, “Oh, no!” I must have scooped it up with the first load of laundry… I paused the machine, stuck both hands in and felt around in the soupy combination of clothes and soapy water. I even turned the bin several times and felt all around again. NO WATCH.

I had decided that ‘it must have been eaten by snakes” (something that happens around here all too often) and prepared to tell my husband that we needed to add getting a new watch for me onto today’s errands list. I steadied myself to look down at the clothes remaining on the floor and put my HAND on my WATCH on top of the washer!

The mystery is solved, but I guess I’ll make good use of ‘standing-back-and-watching-myself’ more and more over the coming years. I really need a good laugh now and then…

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Filed under Are YOU also older than Dirt?, Challenges, Funny Signs - Humor