This is a fight between my head and my gut feelings and my gut feelings are winning right now. It doesn’t matter that I KNOW I’m being childish/immature/unrealistic/whatever-other-adjective-you-choose. It’s how I FEEL, and that is overriding any chance of my acting like an adult.
And, why am I feeling/acting this way, you ask? (Assuming you’re still reading :0) )
I’m being really, really good on my low-carb diet and exercise program. In fact, I’m finishing a month of low-carb eating and tracking, and am on Week 3 of a really good exercise program created by Mike Kutcher, a Seniors’ Specialist Physiotherapist and Exercise Scientist on the website MoreLifeHealth/Seniors.com.
SOMETHING seems to be happening, because my Keto Stix are turning deep purple now. My scales are yo-yo-ing in results. I don’t care if I don’t LOSE weight every day. I realize there is a lot that goes into what shows on the scales any given day. But I resent GAINING weight. Yesterday, for example, the scales showed I had GAINED 2 lbs. Today I’m down half a pound from that, but I’m varying too much for me to handle like an adult. I’ve been told not to weigh every day, and I see the sense in that. The trouble is, I’ve learned the hard way that if I DON’T check it every day, my mind seems to go into relaxation mode, figuring ‘a little bit of this or a little bite of that shouldn’t matter.’ The scales represent my personal accountability.
SOMETHING ELSE seems to be happening, too, in that my jeans got loose. I ordered the next size down. My husband told me to go ahead and order more in that size. I did, but my NEW jeans are loose again. The MEASURING TAPE isn’t showing ANY progress, though. I’ve also read that measurements can be off from one time to the next and that you need to be really careful with it, but I AM.
So. I’m feeling hostile. I would LIKE to have results on the scales and with the measuring tape that I can point to – at least in the comfort of my own home – giving me positive feedback.
I’m SUPPOSED to be reporting to you today the end of WEEK 4 on my low-carb and the end of WEEK 3 of my much more active exercise program. I have lost the pandemic weight gain of 6.6 pounds and am back to my 30-pounds-off-from-my-heaviest point. I have lost about 28 inches from my heaviest, but no difference except the jeans thing to this point in my new push to get and stay healthier.
I will ‘keep on keepin’ on.” Fingers crossed that my results by the end of May will be more encouraging.